a message for you.
please excuse my dust as this blog site is still under construction.
cut deeply.
(posted on Friday, April 23 by eii wyy nae.)
she does not remember affection. sure, she was loved. but she wishes that she could remember the hugs. the words 'i love you' being said. the smiles on their faces when she accomplished something. she knows the moments happened. but she cannot remember them.
she remembers getting in trouble for the chocolate milk spilled on the walls in the living room. to this day, she still cannot figure out how it got there.
she remembers getting in trouble & having to go to her room. she sat right against the door & cried. 
she remembers sitting in the living room alone watching tv when her maaa found out that her friend died. the sound her maaa made that day is still with her. @ times when her maaa laughs it sounds just like that moment & she is immediately taken back.
she wonders why it is so easy to remember these things yet her mind has seemed to be wiped clean of hearing the words 'i love you' & getting hugged. she wants to remember these moments. she closes her eyes & tries so hard to remember. but she struggles to find these memories in her mind.
she knows they’re there. but she cannot remember.
~~~
i wonder if i’ll ever feel that alive again.
Signed with love,
the diarykeeper, eii wyy nae.
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