a message for you.
please excuse my dust as this blog site is still under construction.
I am the scared girl.
(posted on Saturday, January 24 by eii wyy nae.)
I am the scared girl.
I dream all the time of almost traveling, of almost walking through doors. But I never do. I pack my luggage, I count the days on my calendar, I see in my dream-mind's eye the blue, blue water of my almost-destination, but I never go. I am always scared. The planes are always too big, and they always fly at night, and I never go. I get to the airport, I get on the plane, but I never go. It is always a place over the ocean, I will always be gone too long, and I always want to go, but I never do.
I am always scared. I am the scared girl.
And so it is in life. I am the scared girl. I have always been the scared girl. I have always been afraid to open those doors. But those doors beckon. And some of them have windows & I can see what's behind them, and it's fabulous.
I have to say goodbye to the scared girl, but when I do, who will I be? It's a struggle to let her go - she's been with me all my life - but she feels tired & ready to rest.
Can I be brave? Can I just keep her with me, let her see all those wonderful things beyond those doors? Can I hold her close & whisper that it's okay, that I'm safe? Can I be brave? Can I fly?
You haven't seen a tree until you've seen its shadow from the sky." ~ Amelia Earhart.
the diary keeper,
my charliegirl.
Labels: consternation, dreams, imaginings., panicky
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