♥ {confessional, sweet battle && interrupted thoughts} ♥

has 'better' been better.

(posted on Tuesday, October 20 by eii wyy nae.)

a million little working ants are marching across my chest. it is getting a little harder to breath. there is foxglove in my voicebox. i feel like mount etna. boiled sweets in my cheeks. rhubarb & custard & peach ones too. sugar melting on my tongue, in my throat, in my tummy. i wish i could buy myself all the stars in the constellations. equuleus & pegasus & lepus & cassiopeia. i get so sad & my words or penmanship are not enough to make everything better again. & mommy. she is sad also. a lot of people are becoming sad & train sets with milk carriages & coal carriages & wood carriages are not enough to make them happy again. wood for the fireplace & milk for the tea.

i stayed awake until midnight last night just so i could see if the stars shined just a little brighter because it was a new day. my new nightie was fraying at my knees & my toes peeked out of the holes in my bed socks. i got my big toe stuck in the bath tap & it was very sore when i got it out. i seem to do this a lot & i never learn my lesson. one day i just know it will be stuck there forever. i have been reading lots of second-hand books & buying ribbon & paper stencils from the market man. he wears a farmer mans cap & has a funny green coloured scarf & rosey cheeks.

& i stayed awake until midnight last night just so i could see if the stars shined just a little brighter &if that means my life could have been better the next day ... it has been way while since my heart nearly exploded to sense something nice.

~~~